Some days the dark places just seem to be everywhere. Fathers, mothers, daughters and pilots fall from the sky and crash in foggy mountains. Co-workers succumb to disease. Friends tumble into family-angst-pits. Tears come in unexpected moments; watching the news, hearing a song, in business meetings. What do we do with days like this? Answers are sometimes expensive and sometimes non-existent. Crawling in a hole seems not only practical but a wise course of action. But could we be missing an opportunity here? In these gray days? A chance to look for even the tiniest grit of good or beauty? Could it be that we are meant to dig, hopefully desperate, and claw in the mud and rubble until there's something of worth to hold on to? Yes, I think. Yes.
When I look back on my darkest hours, the day of my brother's funeral one of the worst, I mainly remember the people who showed up. The ones who stood in a long line to share a hug or a story. The classmates who finished high school with him. The friends who fought to pull him out of his pain. A university president, a farmer or two, some football players. The cousin who slipped an angel pin into my hand that day - it had belonged to his dear mother, my mother's sister. The preachers who have rotated into our lives in light and shadow, holding up our faith when we were too worn out to do it ourselves. The small huddle - sister, daughter, wife - crouched in the floor begging God for just one good thing to take away from the tragedy. A prayer that was answered in whispers and fringes as stories of the goodness of my brother's heart unfolded. I learned that day how he'd bought a bed for a little boy who had never had one of his own. That generosity echoed into the lives of others through acts of memory-fueled-kindness in the weeks that followed. And a collection of gems began to gather in our grief-grimy hands. Hard won. Oh, so costly. But infinitely beautiful.
So then, let us keep on scratching in the dark. Looking for those who line up to offer us strength. Trusting them to keep the faith until we can pick it up again for ourselves. Lining our pockets with the diamonds we will invariably find winking up from the ground. That's the way it works, you know, the shiny is so much easier to spot in the dark. Selah.
I will give you the treasures of darkness and the riches hidden in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who calls you by name. Isaiah 45:3
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