When I read the Mary & Martha story from Luke, and Jesus says, “Martha, Martha….” Jan Brady pops into my mind. See, in The Brady Bunch, Jan gets tired of being compared to her perfect older sister and utters the iconic line: “Marsha, Marsha, Marsha.” So many parellels to be made: sisters, jealousy, one seemingly perfect, one struggling to be noticed, one whiny, one righteous… Who knew??? The gospel according to the Brady Bunch! There’s a Bible study in there somewhere. I just might have to write that… after all there is an Andy Griffith Show one. I digress… back to Mary and Martha.
So much has been written about Mary and her heart. And I get it… she chose to sit at Jesus’ feet. She got it right. Jesus said so. And while I always want to be Mary in the story, if I’m honest, I’m more like Martha. She’s in the kitchen working her tail off and just wants a little help so SHE can go sit by Jesus, too. She’s the responsible one – who’s gonna feed Jesus and his entourage if she just sits down like Mary? Mary, Mary, Mary. I think it’s easy to see both sisters as one-dimensional. Mary is commended, Martha is scolded. Mary is the good one. Martha is the bad one. But there’s really more to it than this. If you consider some other factors in this encounter and take in the later passages where we see Jesus and Martha interact, you get a much different picture.
In this Luke-recorded scene (10:38-42) Martha is first mentioned as welcoming Jesus into her home. These are not small details – there is speculation that Martha may have been a widow who inherited a house from her late husband and was providing a place for her sister and brother to live. And, she welcomed Jesus – she was glad to see him! He was her friend. Yes, she was distracted with much serving and may have felt alienated at being abandoned by her sister and left to do all the work by herself. But she obviously knew Jesus well enough to be raw and honest with him. She took her anger straight to him. And he was honest with her. He saw her anxiety and showed her what was better: listening to him. And there this piece of the story ends. I wonder what happened next? Did she plop down next to Mary and soak up her Lord’s presence? Did she stomp back to the kitchen in a huff? Not sure. But it’s certainly not the end of Martha and Jesus’ relationship.
John gives two more glimpses into the Jesus/Martha/Mary dynamic in chapters 11 and 12. In the first, there is a tragedy. Lazarus, the brother, was ill. They sent for Jesus when he got sick but he got there too late. (As if.) When Jesus arrives a few days later, true to form, Mary sits in the house and Martha runs out to meet him with a bit of a reprimand. If you had been here this wouldn’t have happened! There she is… blunt, raw, honest Martha. Jesus saves the day, of course, and gives life back to the brother. But this may have been a turning point for Martha. She has this moment when she acknowledges who she believes Jesus to be. And it is spot on. “You are the Christ, the Son of God, even, He who comes into the world.” She goes all in with that little word even… because what comes next is code for… Messiah. He who comes into the world. She embraces Jesus’ identity as the long awaited Messiah. This is huge. Lots of people believed that Jesus was a really good person, great teacher, healer, friend. Martha, in this moment, understands that he is all that and so much more. He is Messiah. The culmination of her history, the fulfillment of every promise – standing right in front of her. I think this is pivotal for Martha. And the next bit of the story provided by John gives evidence.
In chapter 12, there’s another visit to Martha’s house. The political winds have shifted and Jesus is headed to Jerusalem where he will be arrested, tried and crucified. He stops on his way for another meal with his dear friends. Lazarus, fully alive, is at the table. Mary is there, too, and we see her at her finest hour – at Jesus’ feet with expensive perfume. Her adoration filling up the house. And Martha? She’s serving. Again. Nothing has changed but somehow everything has changed. Martha isn’t described as anxious or angry this time. She is simply serving. How is that any different? Hang on for this… there are two Greek words in these passages that are translated as serving: diakonea and diakoneo. Diakonea means to serve as in wait tables. Doakoneo means to serve as in to take care of. The Luke passage uses diakonea. The John passage uses diakoneo. Y’all! Here it is: Martha has gone from being a waitress to being a care-giver. Oh the difference that one letter makes.
Just sit on this a minute… same actions, but different heart! It breaks me. My messy, whiny, busy Martha heart just busts open at this. All this time, I’m thinking I need to be a Mary but I’m just not. I’m too big and awkward and I say the wrong thing and get frustrated and have anxiety. I don’t fit the Mary-mold, I feel alienated and alone sometimes. And Jesus still loves me! Loves me. Loves. me. (I’m not crying, you’re crying.)
Martha, Martha, Martha – all you Martha’s out there. It’s ok to be you. Jesus loves you. He is the culmination of all your history, the fulfillment of every promise. He is your Messiah. Right in front of you. And he will heal your heart. Be you. Be loved. Beloved. Selah.
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